NNNOOOOOOO!
August 23rd, 2010
Archive
Archive for the ‘Positively Ridiculous’ Category
ARGH!
July 29th, 2010
Where’s My Violin?
July 16th, 2010
Because surely, these guys need some sad music.
A number of inmates at the New Hampshire State Prison in Concord are on a hunger strike to protest what they call stifling heat inside the prison.
Let’s get right on the phone with Mother Nature and tell her to cut it the hell out! Darn heat … can’t you see we need to be comfy down here?
Seriously now … I’m all for treating humans well, but I don’t think these folks are anywhere near death because of heat. And the logic of being overheated AND starving yourself? Kinda not-smart, right there. Guess that’s why they’re criminals.
Imagine The Uproar
July 7th, 2010
Double Standards. Inconvenient little things, aren’t they?
Put yourself back in 2008 for a moment. It’s election day – Obama vs. McCain. Imagine an alternate reality. Imagine, outside a building where people are walking in to vote, there are two white-robed klansmen, holding nightsticks. Staring at everyone walking in. Being confrontational. Not blocking the entrance, but not getting out of your way either.
Maybe you’re a black man. Maybe you’re white. The klansman have an aggressive stance as they eye everyone going in and out.
Would that be considered voter intimidation? Would you think it’s a “weak case” proving that there is voter intimidation?
Now imagine if McCain won that election. Charges are filed against the klan member(s) and then suddenly … inexplicably … a white AG drops the case.
Do you think it would be all over the news?
Would there be protests? Would it be front page on every paper on every newsstand? There’s no way to know, but I think it would.
Interesting when you flip the circumstances in a little thinking exercise. I don’t believe the DOJ is biased, and I don’t believe they showed bias in dropping the New Black Panther suit in the manner they did.
No, not bias. It’s racism. An openly racist act by our federal government refusing to prosecute someone exclusively because of the color of their skin.
But then, in a world where our government erases terminology that goes against the narrative they are attempting to build, changes an entire agency’s purpose to religious outreach, issues a lawsuit against a state inundated with violence and kidnappings, and believes that survivalist-types are the biggest threat to this country …
… well, it’s hardly surprising, is it?
What A Load Of Crap
June 16th, 2010
A high-speed chase in Dover ended with a Portsmouth man crashing his car into a light pole and a portable toilet on Tuesday, police said.
driving way too fast
somehow this guy was not drunk
but he was shit-faced
She Was Hot … Like a Cow.
June 12th, 2010
Okay. What?
An 18-year-old Indonesian man says he was seduced by a cow, and that’s why he was having sex with it.
I can’t … I mean … Just … no.
“She called my name and seduced me, so I had sex with her,” the man told the newspaper.
Alit underwent a cleansing ritual. The village chief gave the owner of the cow the equivalent of $562.
Dude … I’d stick a cow in a wig for a crack at $562.
Seriously …
Nasty Prom
June 2nd, 2010
Not your Momma’s dance party …
The students at school-sponsored dances, he told them, weren’t exactly doing the fox trot.
“There would be a tight cluster of students . . . and in the center we had no idea what was going on,” said Susan Nolen, copresident of the Parent Teacher Group and mother of two students at Penncrest. “Clearly, there was inappropriate touching; that was obvious during the cleanup of the dances.”
Whoa – wait. What?
“The custodial staff were,” Nolen explained, uneasily, “cleaning bodily fluids off the floor.”
Okay … I’m not old enough quite yet to say, “back in my day” but … back in my day, at the high school prom, we acted like idiots, certainly. Danced a bit, though I’m no James Brown, and a few morons sneaked in some alcohol and made fools of themselves. Mostly though, harmless fun in a tux.
Bodily fluids on the floor? Dude, that’s just nasty. Why not just forget the prom altogether and have instead a class orgy? I’d imagine the yearbook would be a great hit with an “Orgy 2010!” section.
Kids these days … and people wonder why mine are homeschooled!