… here a Moo, there a Moo everywhere a deranged cop making milkshakes with another species.

Ew:

A Moorestown, N.J., police officer was indicted yesterday on sexual-assault and animal-cruelty charges for allegedly having sex on several occasions with girls and cows.

Make love, not burgers. PETA should hire this guy.

If the charges regarding him sexually assaulting some girl for 5 years in his home are true, I say cut off his nuts and feed him to hungry barnyard pigs.